Soulmate Formulas

The introductary chapter of my book • 6 min read


Dissolve your egos and help others dissolve theirs, this was the first piece of advice I got on how I would find my soulmate. By doing so I would supposedly tap a cosmic energy that was powerful enough and intelligent enough to bring me the right partner. But there was so much more to this mystery that I wasn’t being told. Years later, after finding and losing my soulmate several times, I got so frustrated that I decided to throw open a book written by one of the most admired men of all time, Plato. What I was about to discover startled me, and it was just the beginning.

When I first read Plato, the only line that got my attention was: “If we befriend the God of Love and side with him, we will find our other halves, which rarely happens in this world at present.” At that time I was sharing my favorite quotes with friends of mine, and in this particular case, immediately after discovering this quote and sending it out, I laid down to meditate, and was surprised at the pleasant feeling beginning to pervade my entire body: it was a feeling of lucidity, and I felt no negativity while in such a state. This experience not only gave me the first clue to the soulmate formula but it also taught me what love actually is — consciousness.

Almost a decade later I decided to revisit Plato, because even today I believe that to read a good book only once is a felony. In this reading however I found what appeared to be a formula for singles, though inverted and shrouded in symbolism: ‘The gods refused him the woman because he was soft and hadn’t dared to give his life for love yet, but had tried to enter this world of devils without disguising himself as one.’ This formula seemed to have given me the fundamentals that I was missing at the time, but there was still more to uncover.

As of 1928, thanks to a manuscript reportedly found in the Vatican archives, we’ve had access to the soulmate formula of the great initiate Jesus: ‘Love your spirit, love your body, and love your true brothers and sisters, and then your Heavenly Father will give you his holy spirit, and your Earthly Mother her holy body.’ One of the things that Jesus was addressing in this formula was something I had failed to take seriously: exercise. Even so, this shortcoming of mine was evidence of a much deeper problem: I lacked wisdom. After all, most of my friends were exercising. Why wasn’t I?

In 1768, Emanuel Swedenborg, the scientist revered by Emerson, Balzac and so many others, wrote a great deal about wisdom and even gave it a special place in his book about love: “The more your wisdom grows, the more you perfect your form; and this form does not receive the love of everyone in general, but the love of one in particular…and this union is that of conscious love.” Conscious love is the only kind of love that can produce true love. Sexual love, being accidental and involuntary, cannot last longer than a few years. And emotional love, being unstable, cannot help but turn to hatred. Swedenborg said that conscious love, which is received when the inner mind is opened, is the conjunction of charity and faith, and at its core is chastity. It is no coincidence that in other literary works these same four elements continue to appear in relation to the soulmate.

The talented Mozart alluded to these same elements in his final opera The Magic Flute, an opera which is not so much about finding but catching your soulmate:

“The dark night flees from the light of the Sun!
Soon the generous young man will experience a new life,
soon he will be wholly devoted to our work.
His mind is daring, his heart is chaste,
soon he will be worthy of us.”

In this operatic chorus the elements light, generosity, courage and chastity represent the same four elements that Swedenborg proposed, light representing love, generosity representing charity and courage representing faith. There’s even an esoteric manuscript which connects these four elements to the final book of the New Testament.

In the book of Revelation, John sees the ‘New Jerusalem’ coming from heaven dressed as a wife to receive the husband. Samael Aun Weor, esoteric author of over 60 books, wrote “the only people who will live in the New Jerusalem are those who are full of faith, love, chastity and charity, etc.” He went on to say, “The creative power of the Third Logos, that which gives life to the creatures in the womb, that which causes life to spring forth out of the chaos, is potent and intelligent enough to bring the woman her precise exact complement, the man who really should belong to her.”

The Zohar, a spiritual manuscript that surfaced in the 13th century, the one that gave birth to Kabbalism, also emphasized chastity, love, charity and faith, though more subtly: “Happy is the man whose deeds are meritorious and who walks in the true way, so that soul may be joined to soul as at the very beginning…” Real happiness depends on chastity and love. Meritorious deeds represent charity, while living the truth represents faith.

In the book of Genesis, even older than that of the Zohar, we’re told about the creation of the first man. After the formation of his physical body and his reception of the astral breath, he begins to work on his garden, his soul, while avoiding the forbidden fruit, the spillage of sexual energy. The result of all this discipline was the manifestation of his soulmate. You may regard this formula as too ancient to be relevant to the people of today, but to my surprise much of it turned out to be not only useful but necessary. If your body is beautiful and your blood is clean, if mantric sounds have tuned your respiratory passages to receive the vivifying breath, if you have been feeding your soul with meditation while preserving your chastity, then all that’s left is charity and faith, and that’s what confused me, the omission of one or more of these elements in the instructions of other teachers.

In 1935, Beinsa Douno, the master mind who Albert Einstein looked up to and who Rudolf Steiner considered to be the second coming of Christ, was asked when exactly does a person find his soulmate, to which he replied, “When he awakens his mind, learns how to listen to the voice of the divine and stops postponing things.” As if by magic, I found my soulmate in a matter of hours after applying this formula. In 1944, nine years after this formula was given, the eminent Gurdjieff explained the mechanism behind the magic as follows: if you are working inwardly, Nature will call upon conscious spirits to bring you everything you need for your work, even a complementary spouse. To me it seems that after six intensive hours or so, the inner work reaches a culmination which attunes us to the consciousness of our soulmates, and all that’s left is to go find them, which is done by following our intuition without delay. It is a special type of work that Omraam Mikhael Aivanhov, Beinsa Douno’s successor, was referring to when he said, “Concentrate on the light, and your soulmate will come of their own accord, attracted by the light they see shining from you.”

Yogananda, the world-renowned mystic also loved by Apple visionary Steve Jobs, gave us a different formula and related it to the expression of perfect love. He recommended this for the ‘advanced few’, and if you are reading this chapter, then count yourself as one of them, for the brain of the genius is not only artistic and spiritual but also literary. The indifferent many don’t care to read. Here is the formula: “…[Physical marriage practiced in this world] is one means of soul union for liberation after finding the perfect love of God by intense spiritual discipline, sexual sublimation, and meditation.” On perfect love, Eliphas Levi, the celebrated sage and secret mentor to princes, said, “We should not seek perfect love in others but in ourselves, asking nobody for it as long as we have not found it, and demanding it the less as we feel ourselves more capable of approaching it.” And with regard to Yogananda’s formula, it is almost the same as the others, for discipline builds faith, sexual sublimation ensures chastity, and meditation awakens love.

Discipline was also one of the principles of love in the Hawaiian mysticism of Makua. Makua was the beloved Polynesian teacher who shared stages with the Dalai Lama. His three laws of love were: be disciplined, feel reverence and love humbly. Discipline is the outer expression of faith; reverence is easily felt when in a state of love; and to love without pride, which suggests giving to those less fortunate, implies charity.

In 1973, Clark Wilkerson, who also studied Hawaiian mysticism, published a book called Soul-Mates. After marrying his soulmate, he wanted the whole world to experience it. In his book he says, “If you lock into Universal Harmony with your thinking and living, THEN will the great thing take place...a matching of immortal soulmates...you with your soulmate.” The purer your auric colors, the faster your rate of vibration and consequently the more attractive your magnet will be to your soulmate. One of the formulas that Wilkerson published in his book reads: “Seek the spiritual kingdom, perfect the physical, and through this thou can truly find thy soulmate.”

Now I’m going to reveal my formula: If you are giving more than you are taking, your soulmate will appear on your path. If you always keep your eyes open, you will notice someone who evokes your curiosity. If you are brave and decisive, you will initiate conversation if you are male or provoke conversation if you are female.



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